Lookin fab Miss Cosgrove!

cute! I love her dress, it’s very fun and playful.

I, Ron, was looking at these photographs with my wife, Miranda, who spells her name like Miranda Cosgrove, but pronounces it the same, and I said, “Miranda Cosgrove is a beautiful woman.” And my wife agreed. Then she said, “Is she as beautiful as Ke$ha?” And I looked into her eyes, and I said, “Ke$ha who?” She said, “Don’t you remember? She went to Miranda Cosgrove’s sixteenth birthday party, and they set in motion all the events which led to our being here.”

“Who could forget her? Not me,” I said, “you fall in love with a girl like that, and you never fall out.” My wife did not respond. Instead, she picked up my old pajama top, and we sat and sewed the buttons back on in silence, if you can call my wife belting out an awesome version of “Disgusting” silence.

I can not. But I love Miranda’s voice, more than any other. I imagine if you understand “Happy Feet,” then you can guess what I mean. Except, in my wife’s case, it is not one special song which has that effect. It is everything she does. And she knows it.

As we were sitting there, I heard a tremendous crash, and looked over at the fireplace. There was a cloud of soot, and a disheveled figure in some red garment, lying in the ashes. Santa, I thought, Merry Christmas! Instead, Ke$ha stumbled out and stood up, kind of. I recognized the garment. It was the dress worn by Jennifer Lawrence at the Academy Awards. Only it was kind of dirty, and looked a bit different without Jennifer in it, and with Ke$ha in it. She was beautiful, and Ke$ha, and my first thought was, Happy Birthday! So, I said, “Happy Birthday, Ke$ha, from both of us.” And Ke$ha smiled, and my wife called the Police.

Joy to you, Rose.

Miranda is amazingly Gorgeous!